Untraveled Paths
by IndigoProphecy
Summary: A series of events leave two best friends stranded and lost in the back roads of Ireland. In finding their way, they find each other. A celebration of Artemis and Holly's friendship, occasionally bordering on something more but never quite crossing that line. Three-shot
1. Normalcy

_Warning: this is pure unadulterated fluff. I couldn't help it, I just kept on typing. Artemis and Holly will have a tendency to act like protagonists of a young-adult, coming-of-age novel. I felt like indulging myself with a dose of Holly-Arty BroTP, which, knowing myself, would inevitably lead to OTP but what the hell. Apologies in advance._

** Normalcy**

Being best friends over a long distance was difficult, but they persevered. Like any other relationships distanced by zip codes, and in their case, the earth's crust, they survived through video calls and texts. On Artemis' part, he survived on occasionally hacking into Police Plaza's reports. He didn't tell Holly, partly because he knew that she knew and also partly because hacking was usually associated with blatant creepy stalking. But it eased Artemis knowing what part of the world Holly was flying off to on field missions.

Not even the highest definition of video (and they _do _have the highest definition of video) can make up for the sight before him. Holly had just emerged from the McGraney hill, from the hidden shuttleport. One of her hand was waving at him, while the other clutched a bulky backpack to her shoulder.

He gave a timid wave back, silently amused. Holly didn't even bother to hide her enthusiasm, half running towards him with a radiant smile plastered on her face. He didn't blame her though; he himself was beyond ecstatic, but he kept at his usual impassive self.

"Hey mud boy!" Holly playfully bumped her fist at his abdomen once, unconsciously noticing how _soft_ he was. Same old wimpy Artemis.

"Holly," He greeted back. Ever the gentleman, he pried the backpack from Holly, who willingly yielded it to him. He immediately regretted it, seeing as the thing felt like she had stuffed her whole house in it.

"What is in here? Steel boxes of make-up and ten thousand pairs of stilettos?" The man kidded.

"Haha," She took the pack from him. He might as well have given it willingly for all the good his resistance gave him. To make up for her luggage, Artemis instead opened the door of the car for her. Holly dumped her backpack in before jumping in herself.

Artemis closed the door behind her and went around to the other side. He slid inside the driver's seat and casually revved the engine, waiting for Holly's comment, which she eventually gave.

"You drive?" Holly gave out an unbelieving laugh.

"No, Holly. I sat in the driver's seat and started the engine just for the sake of grandstanding. My driver is in fact, hiding behind that cow."

Holly decided to make Artemis regret goading her and play along his stupid line of sarcasm. "He's one thin man, being able hide behind those skinny cow legs. Why don't you call him so we can get out of here?"

Artemis resisted the urge to sigh and instead drove the car into the farm's driveway. Soon, the Irish countryside's rich emerald trees were whipping past them.

"You get your first prolonged paid vacation in decades and you decide to spend it all with me? Why, Captain, if I didn't know better I'd think you have ulterior motives."

"I do have an ulterior motive. Visas for vacations aboveground are easier to get when you tell Customs you're staying in the place most secure from human detection. Really, Customs is this close to asking you if fairies can stay on the Fowl estate on peak seasons. The other secured sites are just always too crowded."

"So after all these years I'm really just your free above ground ticket?" Artemis pretended to be wounded. He was enjoying Holly's game.

"Yup. Don't forget the free meal ticket. Man, you'll never get rid of me if Butler keeps feeding me with free gourmet food. And the free sauna. Plus the entertainment of watching you," Artemis eyebrows rose and smirked. Holly punched him before continuing. "Watching you do embarrassing things on a daily basis."

"Anyways," Holly continued. "I had all this planned out since you kidnapped me. You were doomed to be my free aboveground accommodations the moment you took that ransom."

"A plan, I see." Artemis' voice was smooth as the car driving along the country road. "Was the kiss by the gorilla cage part of you plan?"

Holly's face puckered into a sour, aghast expression. If she had been drinking a beverage, she would have spitted it out in a cartoon fashion. His comment came out of nowhere, with not so much of a warning. When and where did he pick up the guts to bring _that _up so casually?

Artemis, well aware of Holly's mental state, only chuckled.

"So, since when did you drive?" Holly asked. Artemis graciously accepted her pathetic attempt to change the topic.

He smirked. "Since I was seven."

_Of course, _Holly grimaced. "There's nothing to smirk about. You're driving automatic. You even have GPS."

"Holly, you're digging yourself a hole. You use technology when you fly shuttles and pods, correct? I'm sure they're all automatic and have programmed GPS, not to mention Foaly whispering in your ear. The presence of those technological add-ons doesn't diminish the fact that you fly extremely well, correct? In fact, you cannot fly without them."

"Let's see you try, mud boy." Holly grabbed the small screen on the dashboard and flicked it out the window in one fluid motion.

"Holly!" Artemis' cry was too late. He stopped the car, and got out. Holly was surprised; Artemis never willingly dives into a muddy terrain without coercion. Yet there he was, several meters from the road and scanning the underbrush for the GPS. Perhaps he really can't drive without it. Admittedly, it was foolish of Holly to throw it. She stepped off the road to join Artemis.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know you couldn't find your way without the GPS."

Artemis looked at Holly sourly. "Holly, I've lived in this side of Ireland all my life. I can find Dublin well enough. That GPS you threw also happened to be my phone, which in the wrong hands can plunge the world into an interspecies war. Familiar with the scenario?"

Holly felt really stupid, now. She silently joined Artemis in the hunt, trying to recall where it landed. It couldn't have been that far off. She lifted up a large broadleaf.

"Artemis, I found your phone." The man quickly strode beside her and looked down at the half-foot deep rain puddle. His phone was many things but waterproof was not one of them. He picked up the device, water spilling from its sides and from the cracks on the screen.

Artemis pocketed the broken device and wordlessly made his way back to the car. Biting her lip, Holly followed.

xxx

Tara was not that far from Dublin, so Holly started to wonder when three hours has passed and still no city skylines came to sight.

"Artemis, where are we? I'm really missing that free sauna I was talking about."

"Why don't I check my GPS?"

Holly sighed. If you thought about it, chucking a phone out the window was nothing compared to kidnapping and manipulation and lying, right? "I thought you, and I quote, 'can find Dublin well enough'."

"My mother's hosting a gala tomorrow night. Do you really want to go back to Fowl Manor, help my mother choose the perfect menu and color scheme, get conned into a dress and watch me be coerced by my mother to dance with every single affluent bachelorette in attendance?"

It was tempting, but the dress won't be worth it, she decided. Especially if it would be a thousand-euro dress. "So where are we going?"

"I have a private beach along the west coast. It's a twelve hour drive. And yes, Holly, there's a sauna."

Holly's suspicion sparked. A week on the beach with only Artemis was unnerving. Not that she suspected him of taking advantage of her; they were too close in friendship for that. She was more worried that he was actually taking her to a secret nuclear weapons factory or a mafia rendezvous. "And you didn't tell me this before because?"

"It only occurred to me after standing in the woods in the back roads of rural Ireland and seeing my iPhone dysfunctional in a rain puddle." Holly sighed. He was never going to let that go. "I realized that my mother cannot contact me if my phone was, say, irrationally chucked out the window of a moving car by a maniacal elf."

"So spontaneous planning is your thing now, eh? Fine, just as long as you don't spontaneously plan to sacrifice yourself _again._ But then again, its okay for you to do that because that's _nothing _compared to the ghastly deed of plunging your phone in water. Why don't you tell me I started a plague while you're at it?"

Artemis found himself amused that Holly felt the need to play _that _card. Or shall he say _those _cards. However will he gain the upper hand if Holly keeps on bringing up those things? Nevertheless, it was all a challenge to him. Really, he should thank Holly for providing them. This would be one interesting ride.

"Look, I'm sorry for the phone, okay?" Holly said, after Artemis served her fifteen minutes of cold silence. When he didn't so much as blink in response, Holly dropped the mother bomb. "I really am sorry, _Arty."_

Even though his eyes were on the road, Holly still felt a fear when Artemis' face split into his vampire smile. "Yes, Holly, I'm sure you will be."

xxx

A few hours has passed when Holly woke to the sound of something _flopping._ The car, previously smooth as any luxury vehicle Artemis buys, was now bubbling along the road as if it was a horse-drawn carriage.

"What is that?"

Artemis stopped the car. Luckily, the country road was deserted and nothing but a lone cow could witness Artemis' impending embarrassment. With his karma and knack for awkward situations, he knew it was only a matter of time until _this_ happened.

"I believe that was the sound of a flat tire." The genius said wryly. He got out of the car, and Holly followed suit.

"_A flat tire?" _Holly had already upped her usual game, with her hands characteristically flailing and her voice shrill. She joined Artemis, who was surveying the deflated front left tire as if merely staring at it would return its previously mint condition.

He sighed. Artemis had a feeling that the elf will once again find a way to blame him for their current predicament.

"Well, you just had to insist on driving." Holly rolled her eyes. "This would never have happened if I drove."

"Correct. If you drove, we would never have arrived here. After all, you can't reach the pedals." Artemis retorted, deadpan.

"At least you could've brought Butler. But _noo_o-"

"Don't you have your communicator?" Artemis interrupted, inwardly berating himself for not thinking of this earlier.

Holly clicked her tongue, dashing Artemis' hopes. "I'm on vacation. Vacation-visa holders aren't allowed to bring fairy tech outside shuttleports for security. I did have the regulation tourist tracker, but I chucked it in the trash the moment I stepped out of the airport. Didn't make a fuss since Foaly kind of expected me to trash the tracker. So nope. Not a millimeter of fairy wire on me."

Artemis bit his lip, repressing his urge to groan theatrically. "Holly, please. Just change the tire."

"Are you ordering me to change the tire?" At first she thought she misheard, but the mud whelp really was asking her to change the tire. "_You're _the man here. I'm the little girl who can't reach the pedals, remember? _You _change the tire."

"I thought you were against female stereotyping." Artemis retorted.

"It does have its perks sometimes. Like right now. I'm not changing a tire while you park your pale ass under some tree and lament over your dunked phone. Besides, I have no idea how to change a tire. Fairy vehicles haven't got tires for centuries now."

"Holly, do _I _look like someone who knows how to change a tire?" Holly had to admit: dressed in his usual dress shirt and slacks, Artemis looked like he would die if so much as a tiny grease smear stains his millionaire garments.

"Fine. We'll figure it out together, okay? Unless you rather live here in the middle of grassy nowhere."

For a moment, Artemis entertained the idea of actually living in this place with Holly. They could make adequate money with the milk from that lone cow and take pleasure in the small, important things of life. Perhaps he'll call his assistant tomorrow and have him buy this whole mountainside, and the mountain as well to be efficient.

"These looks like the screw-bolt thing that's holding the tire in place." Holly was already crouched in front of the tire, her handy omnitool in hand. She clicked it so it whirred to life. One by one, the lug nuts came off.

Artemis opened the trunk and took out the tool box. He handed Holly the jack. Holly just looked at him. _Are you doing this to annoy me? _Her face asked. In truth, her features almost always looked like this.

"This is a jack." Artemis explained, to which Holly rolled her eyes to._ Obviously, _her eyes said. "It lifts the car so we can get the flat tire out."

"You said _we, _correct?"

Artemis sighed and rolled his sleeves up. Resigned, he gingerly crouched beside the elf, making sure that not a single blade of grass grazes his Armani pants.

"We should never have done this." He muttered, his long, pristine fingers clutching the jack. As he pulled it up, inevitable rust and dirt smeared itself throughout his hand. An involuntary groan rumbled in his throat.

"What, impending humanity-erasing spells didn't stop you but suddenly a flat tire is too much?" Holly taunted, removing the tire. On a whim, she scooped up a handful of clay and smeared it up Artemis' pale arm. Utterly mortified, the man made a noise somewhere between a grunt and a whine.

Though Artemis was at the age where the government classifies him as an adult and at the intellect where his brain mature him far beyond his actual years (which in itself was undefined, thanks to his three-year Hybras stint), Artemis did the most immature respond. His features went hard and his eyes went cold as he raked a handful of dirt with his already dirty hand and smacked it straight to her face.

Holly let out a small _oof_, instantly regretting making a sound after she tasted the earthy soil. When he lifted his hand off her face, she slowly wiped the dirt from her eyes in one fluid motion. Just as slowly, she opened her eyes, and both were blazing with fury.

"_Fowl_," She actually _snarled. _The sound made Artemis calculate if his revenge was worth what was coming.

She pounced on him, pinning him on his back with her body, locking him in place by putting her legs on his opposite sides. She started smearing all the stones, earth and uprooted plant life. Her small hands grazed across his chest and down his arm in repetitive, aggressive strokes. It was only after a few minutes that she realized that she was sitting on top of the man. She froze; Artemis was under her and was looking at her with his customary pleased expression.

_Definitely worth it, _Artemis thought.

"_Mud _whelp." Holly spat, covering her mortification with a miserable pun. She threw one last mud pie at him before she rose.

"Thank you, Holly," The elf shot him a murderous look. His smirk only deepened. "Thank you for sullying my three thousand-dollar shirt."

_Who pays bloody thousands for a shirt? _Holly thought. _Artemis Fowl, that's who._

Artemis proceeded to unbutton the said shirt. The elf's eyes watched as his nimble fingers popped each fastening one by one. The shirt he wore under was a black, V-neck: a stark contrast to his almost-white skin and a window to his protruding collar bones.

"_What _are you doing?" Holly finally said when Artemis was halfway through undressing.

"I am not getting mud in my car, Holly." Artemis' left eyebrow salaciously. Well, for Holly it looked salacious. "Relax, I have an undershirt. Besides, thou shall be forever chaste lest I, Orion, will perish."

Holly slammed her omnitool against the tire's rim aggressively. "Shut the hell up, Orion. And what makes you think I'm chaste?"

Artemis sniggered, not pausing from folding his sullied Ralph Lauren button-down.

They were at a landmark. Who would ever know that the little evil boy would someday openly and comfortably bring up chastity with Holly? He seemed totally unperturbed. _But why am I bothered? _Holly thought.

"Don't get your worry nut in a fuss, Arty. With those skinny white trash arms and putty chest, I'm sure my _chastity _is well-protected from you for the rest of our relationship." Holly instantly regretted it as Artemis treated her with one of his vampire gazes, but unlike his customary smile, his gaze was more intent, the blue twisted with something darker. What she had said was a lie of course, and they both knew it. He was thin, yes. And that skinny white trash arms remark had some merit to it. However, his body was far from putty ever since Butler's incessant nagging put Artemis inside a gym and gave him taut muscles.

"Just make yourself useful and hand me the spare tire." She snapped, prying her eyes away. D'arvit. If it weren't for the new Artemis' restored Fowl-blue eyes. Really, his dichromatic ones were less…less…

"Though unlicensed, I am a trained psychologist. Even if I haven't intimately known you for almost a decade, I still know that aggression is a smoke screen for whenever you feel vulnerable. That's how I now know you are, indeed, _chaste."_

"D'arvitting- _look_, Artemis. Just give me the damn tire or _I'll _park my well-toned ass under some tree and lament over my lost sauna while you can do all the work."

Artemis chuckled once more, amused beyond all levels. His chuckle stopped short when he opened the spare tire compartment of the vehicle. It was empty.

"Holly," He called out. When she didn't answer, presumably still fuming at the wake of his mind torture, he went back around to where she was crouched. Bending beside her, he patted a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"Remember that incident we were stuck in a troll-infested amusement park and you told me we're going to be fine?"

Holly froze. "What is it? Is it a troll? A bio bomb?"

"No, no. Nothing so drastic." Artemis straightened up and backed away. Surely, Holly would go violent after she hears the news. "There is no spare tire in the compartment."

Artemis had already long since filed the fact that Holly's face was very expressive, especially in dire situations. She was just always brimming with fire and emotion. Right now, she wore her most used expression when she was around Artemis: _are you freaking kidding me? _

"_What?" _ The word was spat out and drawn out. She seemed to be always saying that expletive lately.

"The twins used this car last, on a road trip to Wexford. I didn't know they used the spare tire. Don't worry. I could always call for help." Artemis smiled sweetly as he showed Holly his dead smartphone.

"What are we going to do?"

"What, impending humanity-erasing spells didn't stop you but suddenly a flat tire is too much?" Artemis shot, returning Holly's own statement to her.

"Just tell me what our next move is, genius." Holly extracted two wet wipes from her back pack and was already wiping the mud off of her face. After her guilt prodded her, she offered one to Artemis, who graciously accepted.

"Someone must own that cow. I drove past a barn about thirty minutes ago. It would be about a mile away from us now. Or we could stay here for the night."

The sun was just a few minutes shy from disappearing beneath the horizon. Already the trees were bathed in an orange glow, preparing for darkness. "Clearly, with my lack of walking prowess, we won't make it to the said barn by sundown. Besides, unlike a possibly hostile-owned wooden barn, this custom-made Maserati Grandturismo is _missile_ proof and has a specially designed security system. Also, it has a heater."

"Dibs on the back seat." Holly shouted; already, she was busy spreading the contents of her backpack across the back seat, like a dog marking his territory.

Logically, Holly can still comfortably lie straight with plenty of leg room in one of the single front seats as opposed to Artemis, who can barely stretch out if he were to lie straight on the back seat. But Artemis wasn't one to deprive a woman of comforts, even if the said woman was a mud-smearing, phone-destroying Holly Short.

He regretted this a few hours later, when he was trying to find a comfortable position on the shotgun seat. Meanwhile, Holly's shirts and socks were having the time of their lives, having twice the space they need on the oxblood leather back seats. Already, he wished he had brought the Fowl Bentley instead, which has a spacious enough legroom in the backseat to accommodate both of their bulks. Heck, even the Bentley's trunk was more comfortable than the Maserati's front seat.

Holly returned, having come from behind a tree to do her business. Upon shutting the door, the car light that had automatically switched on turned off, plunging the two in darkness again. Once she was cozy, she went for a stretch, slightly moaning. The black shirt she was wearing hitched up, exposing her LEP-regulation abs in the night's shadows.

Artemis cleared his throat. "How have you been, Holly Short?"

"You mean since the last time we talked which was yesterday? Nothing much. Just a shuttle ride and some shuttle port bureaucracy." Holly said, still in her snapping mood. She propped her head on her backpack, fluffing it like a pillow. "Artemis?"

"Yes?"

"Why did you bring us here? Really."

"To be honest, I am sick of mother holding these charity galas to find me a girlfriend. She's almost half-convinced I'm homosexual. Perhaps I'll tell her just that, if it would stop her, though I think it would just make her introduce me to bachelors rather than bachelorettes."

"You really can't handle women, can you, Arty?"

"My dear friend Holly, there is a distinct difference between can't and won't. I am the latter. I simply refuse to deal with those trivialities. I have far more important things to busy myself with."

"Like getting stuck on an unmapped road in the middle of a deserted meadow?"

"No. Like receiving my best friend who has visited me for a vacation. Though I admit I am not doing much of a good job at it. We will get to that beach, eventually."

"Admit it, Artemis. You can't talk to girls. You're a twenty-two-year-old man who can't talk to girls." Holly teased. "Besides, if you don't call your mother, won't she think you got stuck in Limbo again or something?"

"Holly, as you have succinctly put, I am a twenty-two-year-old man. I can do whatever I want and disappear for however long I want."

"Not that age has stopped you before, eh?"

"You really are feeling vicious today. Are you on your cycle?"

Holly kicked the backrest of Artemis' seat. Hard. "Don't you have social barriers? Gods, you're on a roll today. No wonder you're running away from women. I bet women are running away from you too as we speak."

"I am a doctor and a scientist, Holly. These things are inconsequential to me."

"It ain't for the rest of us, Artemis. So shut up about it."

"I'm sorry. It slipped my mind that you are _chaste. _" Holly could almost _hear _his smug smile.

"Artemis, I have existed for 89 years already. Plus, unlike you, I am not a socially-disabled egotistical twat who is detached from society because of my family's ill-gotten wealth. I am working in a male-dominated work environment and I studied in co-ed schools. Not to mention I had no parental supervision after my parents died halfway through my adolescence."

"Interesting. Those things you stated paint an accurate picture of your society. It seems your mere exposure to-"

"Artemis, I just travelled through thousands of miles of bedrock and thousands of kilometers of Irish countryside and I am tired. Mind if I doze off? Feel free to continue your sociology prattle though. It always lulls me to sleep."

"Good night, Holly. I am sorry for our predicament, and for the loss of your access to my mother's sauna." Artemis said, already feeling the tendrils of sleep creeping into his eyes.

"It's okay, Artemis." Holly sighed, her voice already heavy with the traces of impending sleep. "It's kind of nice, just talking, being on this road trip with you."

"It does feel rather surreal. A road trip with a friend is just so-"

"Normal?" Holly supplied. "It is mundane if we compare it to our other adventures."

"It does have its own charm though. Normalcy has its own charm." Artemis concluded.

Holly didn't reply. In the absence of their conversation, the night was filled with a deafening silence, the kind that only lingered in untouched rural settings. The occasional cricket sung as the night went deeper. Soon, Artemis was in deep sleep himself.

Xxx

**A/N:** Every Howl author had written that Holly-comes-up-and-visits-Fowl-Manor fic, so I decided to make one of my own. With a twist, of course (the twist being they go on a road trip rather than fool around the manor). I did warn you that this was 99% plotless. I'm sorry for posting it despite its worthlessness, but I know there are readers out there who are occasionally in a Howl fluffy mood. I know I should be working on other stuff (like Glimpse ehehehe) but I found this old thing floating around and decided to tweak it up and post it. There's two more chapters of this, so hang-around if you want more.

Inspired by The Edge of Never by J Redmerski. (If you're thinking about checking out this novel, know that it was an okay/meh book at best and cliché at its worst. Kind of like this Howl drabble-ish thing of mine.)


	2. Serendipity

**Serendipity**

The night was at its darkest when Holly woke Artemis. Judging from the depth of the sky, Artemis, in his barely lucid state, surmised it was predawn. Holly was peering at him from the back seat, her face an inch from his. She looked so much like a fairy in that moment, with her curious eyes wide and bright in the darkness. He felt a poke at his side and realized it was Holly's hand trying to shake him into wakefulness.

"I'm awake." He said, fully opening his eyes.

Holly immediately withdrew at a safe distance. She transferred the rest of her body to the adjacent driver's seat, snuggling deep into its backseat. The early morning chill was seeping through the shut windows, and even the heater couldn't battle it off. Artemis, already alert, fumbled his right arm around to retrieve his coat from the glove compartment. He threw it over Holly haphazardly.

"Thanks," Holly wrapped the smooth material tighter around her.

"Why did you wake me, Holly? The sun hasn't even risen yet,"

"I'm…jetlagged." Holly said, plucking the term from her gift of tongues. "It's not the appropriate word but-"

"Fairies have always been nocturnal creatures, correct? And the shuttle ride didn't help your internal clock either."

"Mhm," Holly agreed absentmindedly. "Artemis, can we go for that barn right now?"

"Why?" Artemis could not fathom any situation where it would be preferable to trek through foot-high grass without the light of the sun to warn you of undesirable things. After all, there had been a cow last night. And where there are cows, there tend to be cow feces.

"Uh, I know I don't usually bother you with mundane stuff but I'm kind of hungry. I haven't eaten real food for two days now."

Artemis clicked his tongue, feigning the disappointment of a parent. "That's what you get for insisting on an irregularly scheduled diet."

"Fine," Holly snapped. Just in time, her stomach rumbled, pleading with the Fowl heir for her.

"Alright, we'll go. Daylight will soon break anyway. Gather your things,"

Holly hopped back to her side of the car and started packing up her clutter. From the rearview mirror, Artemis watched Holly throw odds and pieces into her pack, not caring about the mess and hassle it would create when she would want to retrieve an item from the bag later on. Only Holly could pull off being a disorganized soldier.

Artemis blinked several times and flexed his fingers, attempting to fully vanquish sleep. Once satisfied with the speed of his flowing blood, he started gathering his own things from the various compartments in the dashboard. Vaguely he thought about the lucky farmer who would stumble upon his beautiful Maserati, which was worth millions despite its missing tire (they had decided against reinstalling the flat tire; it was no use anyway).

"Holly, you think you could fit this inside your pack?" Artemis asked, bending around to hand Holly the sole possession he couldn't fit into his pockets. He had already pocketed his wallet and useless phone.

"A gun?"

"Just in case," Artemis added, unable to stop himself from mirroring Holly's smile. They were thinking the same thing: only they could manage to turn innocent hitchhiking into a situation requiring firearms. Base from experience, both of them knew the odds of that very situation happening is very high. "And besides, we can't leave a gun wandering around for some drunkard to pick up, especially a fairy-wired gun."

"You should really be more responsible with your fairy tech, Artemis." Holly said, frowning at the idea of Artemis having tons of unregistered fairy gadgetry sprawling above ground.

"I am. That's why I am asking you to take it, correct? Besides, I put a self-destruct on all my gadgetry. I did pick up my phone, remember?" Artemis patted his pants' back pocket, where he had stuffed the worthless phone. He would've placed it at the special phone compartment in his coat, but Holly was still wearing it. "I even traded my memories just to retrieve the C Cube from Spiro. You're forgetting who you're talking to."

"Thanks for reminding me, Mr. Ego." Holly rolled her eyes. After a pause, she spoke again. "Artemis, can you give me five minutes to change? I don't really know how long we'll be walking."

_Why didn't she change when I was asleep? _Artemis surveyed the dark surrounding outside. He'd been in more dire situations but there's something about stepping into dark woods alone. "Of course, I'll wait outside."

"No, it's fine. It's nothing you haven't seen before." Artemis blinked. Holly was playing him back for his comments yesterday. "Just don't look, okay?"

Before he could affirm or even shift his body into an obvious _I'm not looking _position, Holly had already pulled her shirt over head. Artemis stared a beat before averting his gaze. He decided upon busying himself with pretending to find his left shoe, which was actually already securely attached to his foot.

"Done," Artemis heard a click. Holly had already stepped out of the car, stretching her lithe figure in the chilly morning air. The tiniest amount of sun already blushed the sky, painting Holly's silhouette. A thought sprawled across Artemis' mind: _how can she be real?_

"The barn is just a few miles away. A couple of hours of walk, I'd say, even with me as your trekking companion." Artemis told Holly, joining her on the asphalt road. Now that there was adequate light, he saw that the cow was gone.

"I say we go that way," Holly pointed to the meadow, a direction perpendicular to the road. Slight fear gripped Artemis: when an idea besets Holly's brain, she goes through hell to make him go through with it. Upon the thought, he realized he was the same; he was just as insistent as Holly when he gets an idea, though granted that his ideas tend to be more calculated than hers.

"Holly, certain shelter is that way. Why would you want to stray from the road?"

"Think with your heart for once." The phrase was vaguely familiar and it took a beat before Artemis recognized that he had thought the very same words once before. The words got him killed, if he recalled the feeling of Bruin Fadda's soul-freeing spell correctly. "Look at that spectacular horizon. Those trees. Don't you want to know where the cow went?"

"I am certain that the cow is now in the barn, waiting to be milked." Artemis replied tersely. "Holly, you haven't had a vacation since before I was even born. I can fully assure you that we won't encounter a sauna that way."

"It's my vacation, and I can do what I want. If you want to go that way, then fine."

_She knows I would follow her wherever she goes. _Artemis grimaced. Her assumption was correct. There was no way he was going to leave her alone above ground without her recon gear even if his intellect and the limitless credit card in his wallet were the only things he had to fend for her; moreover, it was he who was supposed to be her host during this vacation.

Holly was already two meters in the meadow, walking farther and farther away from Artemis and the road. The grass was almost half as tall as her, engulfing her. Artemis waited on the road, pride refusing to bow down to the elf. How long was she going to spindle out her bluff?

She had already reached the end of the clearing, and was about to step into the shroud of still maturing trees. After a second, she was gone behind the trunks' shadows. Artemis sighed and ran as dignified as he could after her.

Xxx

They passed through two fields, a bog and a stile, occasionally indulging each other with light conversation and bickering. Soon Artemis had added an invaluable knowledge to his already vast collection: leather loafers, no matter how expensive, are not made for marching through raw nature. The shoes were intact and still in one piece, but mud had long ago replaced its customary shine. The familiarity of the shoes didn't do anything for Artemis' already aching feet; not to mention his rumbling hunger aggravating his irritation. For the first time ever, Artemis wished he was in rubber shoes.

"Why would you choose this, Holly Short? We could be eating eggs and drinking milk right now."

"It's funny how I'm the one who lives underground yet I see so much of the world than _you _would ever want. I bet you won't have a problem living all your life in Haven; we've got tons of computers there."

Artemis was silent for once. Holly had spoken to him in her usual light bickering tone, but what she had said felt like something deeper. Often he forgets how important the world's wonders are to Holly, and how little she gets to see of it.

A gasp pulled Artemis from his thoughts. The elf had been walking a few steps ahead of him, but now she was completely gone from his eyesight. He searched for Holly and found her atop the hill they were about to climb. She was frozen; whatever sight that met her above that height must be either catastrophic or truly majestic. As quickly as he could manage, he marched up the incline. What he saw atop the hill chilled his soul.

After trekking through two fields, a bog, a stile and finally, this hill, the two best friends have come upon an ancient oak tree, bended over a rushing river. They have been here before, back when they were different people: a broken boy and an incomplete elf.

Neither said a word, afraid that voices would break the magical moment. Slowly, they walked towards the tree together. Holly quickened her pace, racing slightly ahead. Once under the protective embrace of the oak's branches, she sat snuggled between two roots. Artemis walked up to join her.

It was the rarest sight of all: an unadulterated smile broke Artemis' impassive features. He was unable to resist it. He had not thought about this place for _years_, but he never forgot. Never. For his extensive vocabulary, Artemis couldn't find a single word to describe how he felt. It was happiness, and so much more.

"Stay back, human." She said, feeling each syllable spill out of her mouth. The words almost made her cry.

Instead, she laughed. Incapable of denying his similar elation, Artemis joined her.

Everything was surreal. It was like a time stop was over them, trapping them in their own little world under The Tree That Changed Everything. They spent the next couple of hours in silence, listening to the river's song and drowning in their memories.

Who would have known, all those years ago that one day they would return here, together and in friendship? If anything, being here, right now, made both of them realized how far they have come and how inseparable their threads are ever since it was knotted together right under this oak's wise branches.

"How come we never thought of coming here before?" Holly said, her voice soft, still afraid to break the magic.

"That would be the megalomaniac pixie keeping us occupied."

"I remember everything about that night. It's funny how I thought about it only now, amidst all these years."

Artemis nodded. "Yes. The memory of that night only recurred to me right now. This tree was the fifth stake-out. We had been stalking ancient oaks for four months until we found you here."

"Wow, five is really your lucky number, huh?" Holly goaded. Then her voice turned gentle. "What if you never found me under this tree?"

The question felt like a punch to Artemis' gut. He never fathomed it before. What would his life be if he had never met Holly?

"I'd probably be in Haven, still working. Opal would probably be queen of everything down there." Holly continued, answering her own question.

Artemis was silent. Until Holly asked the question, he had never realized. Where would he be now without Holly? He'd be somewhere on this world, still broken but already beyond repair.

"Thank you, Holly." Artemis said. Right now, he was sure that there would never be a moment in his life without Holly, lest he get lost and wither.

Silence and deep thoughts engulfed them again. They sat in silence for a long stretch of time.

"I've returned to this place a couple of times throughout the years, for the Ritual, but it never felt anything close to now. It's the surprise. Somehow, being with you, unexpectedly stumbling upon it did the trick."

"Serendipity," Artemis supplied. "Discovering something through chance and fate."

Xxx

They left their tree deep into the afternoon and began hiking back to wherever. Artemis has long resigned himself to the fact that Holly is intent on making this sporadic backpacking trip across Ireland and trudged after her. Their years of friendship held back his whining mouth; this was the one thing he could give to Holly without easily spending money to get it. It felt right.

What didn't felt right, though, was the day-old cotton shirt glued to his back with sweat and grime. He and Holly only dared to wash their arms and faces by the river. Even if the ancient oak and enchanted wood made them feel otherwise, it was still the twenty-first century and no sane-brained being would go bathe in a river this side of the era.

Holly was feeling a little fresher, having wiped her body with yesterday's shirt that she had dampened in the river. She had offered Artemis, but he declined on whim. It was a declination he now regretted.

His memory of the place was hazy, but he does recall the general direction of the nearest road where Butler had parked their jeep a decade ago. It was in this direction they headed, and eventually they found the man-made path back to civilization. Holly went without complain, having satisfied her fair-share of nature tripping.

The tree had softened them both, but eventually it wore off and soon Artemis' unexercised legs were screaming. The chilly climate didn't help the fatigue and hunger. Even Holly ran out of words, being too tired to waste her breath. They walked in silence as their thoughts morphed from whimsical nostalgia into downright regret and visions of Butler's Belgian waffles.

Their companionable silence was broken by a loud _squish. _

Holly stopped in her tracks and looked back to where Artemis was lagging behind. The human had all but stopped. He just stood there, wearing his usual indifferent expression. She jogged back, her backpack going up and down as she moved.

Upon closer inspection, Holly ceased her approach and laughed her soul out.

Artemis' early morning theory proved correct. Where there are cows, there tends to be cow feces. Case in point: the poo coating one of his twenty-thousand dollar topsiders.

"Gods, you have the worse karma!" She squeezed in between her gales. "What did you do in your life? Sell the last of an endangered primate to a crazy animal hater?"

Artemis simply refused to dignify Holly's ribbing with a reply. He abruptly extracted his foot from the lump. He did so in Holly's direction, sending splatters of the brown, green-specked goo onto her jeans. It shut Holly up.

Without a word the two had reached a consensus: they resumed their trek in total indifference to the digested grass smell following their steps.

"Don't look so dour, Arty." Holly said, shifting her pack. It was really heavy. Speaking of her backpack, how she wished she could go change into her clean, poo-free extra pair of pants, even if the only pants she has left were her gym leggings. "This was _your _genius idea, after all."

Then, Artemis' aforementioned karma came around to collect toll again. It had begun to rain. The water fell in sheets from the sky; the two lost wanderers were immediately soaked.

Artemis groaned in the most theatrical, spoiled-by-millionaire-parents manner.

"At least the poo will wash-off!" Holly shouted through the sound of pouring rain.

"You seem happy," Artemis commented, somehow cheered by the carefree smile that materialized on Holly's face.

Holly tilted her face upward, letting the drops fall on her features in startling intervals. "We don't get much rain back home. And when I do get rain, I'm too preoccupied with a deranged pixie or a rogue troll."

"I have never been drenched in rain before, either." Artemis said. Butler had always been ready with an umbrella. "In fact, I don't recall ever stepping out in the rain, even in a light drizzle."

Holly looked at Artemis through the translucent wall of falling rain drops. His dark hair was plastered flat around his head, dragged down by the water. The day of walking under the clouded sun gave a flush of color across the zeniths of his sharp cheekbones and his aristocratic nose. The muddy clothes he wore were almost see-through in the damp parts that stuck to his skin.

"You're like a whole different person, like a normal person." Holly remarked, unable to let go of the sudden realization in her head.

"So this is what a normal person does." He mused. And thus he concluded: "For today, we are just two normal people who got caught in the rain."

Holly did not respond, absorbed in her thoughts. What if they _were _normal people, regardless of their species, her responsibilities, his intellect? What if he was just some scientist and she was some police woman and they met on that cursed road when she came over to help him with that cursed flat tire?

The conversation had kept them warm. Now that it had petered out, the two began to feel the cold sink through their drenched clothing and into their bones. Holly more so, as elves were warm creatures by nature.

Fortunately, Holly's karma earned from all those years of guiding a criminally astray human boy took its turn in the ongoing karma toll collection. A wooden cabin slash ancient gasoline station emerged in the road bend. Holly and Artemis ran for the roof. Halfway, they started laughing; Holly infected Artemis with her happiness. There was _something_ about running through the rain, and running with your best friend heightened the experience.

Once under the cabin's overhang, their laughter petered out and they pause to catch their breath. Protected from the rain, the two began shaking off the excess water and wringing their clothes, reducing their status from _dripping wet _to just _waterlogged. _Artemis took this time to observe their surroundings: the wooden housing was actually a convenience store. Antique metal signage bedecked the front wall and on the door itself; the "open" sign barely distinguishable among the soda and gasoline ads.

"I'll go and see if they have dry clothes and a phone."

"Wait," Holly dug through her lone luggage. Her soldier pack was water-proof, salvaging its contests from the rain's onslaught. She retrieved two fairy band-aids from a first aid kit and handed them to Artemis. "You think you could wrap these around my ears like you did during our Extinctionist escapade?"

"I doubt that's going to work. It's not safe."

"I'm going to go in to change anyways. Unless you're expecting me to strip in the great outdoors and -"

"Shield," Artemis interrupted.

Holly went on as if she hadn't heard the genius. "Besides, there's probably one drunk Irishman manning the register. My hair can cover it further. No one's going to notice."

Artemis just looked at her in silence.

"Artemis, if I'm not in that well-heated cabin in ten seconds I'm going to body slam you and feed you your broken phone."

"Alright," Artemis consented, too cold to argue. He took the bandages from Holly. He exposed the adhesive of one, kneeling to get a better reach. His fingers wrapped the material across her ear tips, ever so slowly and lingering as to make sure it fitted properly. Artemis could feel Holly's warm breath on his skin, and he was sure she could feel his, which was still heavy from their run through the rain. Artemis did the same to her other ear, just as slow; his fingers unintentionally grazing and lingering.

"What do you think?" Holly asked once Artemis had finished his work. She hid her fluster well.

The man stood up and stepped back, admiring his handiwork. He reached back down and carefully arranged locks of her matted, red hair against her cheeks. "Passable," He deemed.

As he followed Holly's almost iridescent image skipping to the front door, he idly wondered why the universe was gracing him so.

Xxx

**A/N: **Almost anyone would start laughing if they ran through the rain (unless of course they were running through it to get to some car accident or something). The thing about Artemis is, aside from being the son of a crime lord, his opulent upbringing denied his childhood the simple joys in life, like feeling the rain on your skin. Artemis and Holly going back to The Tree That Changed Everything was the first thing I wrote, and it was around that that I wrote the other stuff. The Fowldom's lack of response, is as usual, disappointing. Is the fandom dying or is this fic _that _worthless? Pretty please give me your thoughts on the story. Criticisms are, as always, welcome. Actually, they're well appreciated.


End file.
